“I met my employer on Tinder.”
And, with that, welcome to The Bull & Bear’s 2015 Sex Survey. Clocking in at over 1,200 responses, this was by far our most popular survey yet; although, that comes as no surprise seeing as you McGillians seem to find as much pleasure talking about sex as you do partaking in it. From your self-love habits when no one’s looking to your exhibitionistic antics when all eyes are in fact on you, we sincerely thank you for having taken the time to spill the beans on all your sexual exploits. I can’t say I needed to read all of that, but hey, at least I can now say I know all my fellow classmates that much better – right?
As you scroll down, we hope you take the time to appreciate the sublime images, shot by The Bull & Bear’s own Stella Lee, in what can be called our very own homage to 50 Shades of Grey – one that would certainly get even Mr. Grey himself all hot and bothered. As you admire the photographs, do pay heed to the captions layered over them, as they are in fact true stories – every single one of them.
That said, admittedly, this was by no means a scientific research study aiming to uncover some esoteric truths on the erotic activities that take place on campus. I mean, to paraphrase one astute observer, “literally anyone” who had access to our Facebook page could have answered the survey. Although I beg to differ that this revelatory detail means that our “resulting data is worthless,” I guess it just means you have to take everything with a grain of salt. Still, as much as some might have used this as an opportunity to anonymously embellish their sex life, I’m sure that there’s so much that could’ve have been said, but that probably wasn’t.
After all, to quote one of our most forthcoming respondents when asked to describe their most ridiculous Frosh/Carnival stories, “If I told you, I’d have to kill you.”