Congratulations! You got the part! Since the day you were born, you’ve been the main character in your story, and truthfully, there is no one better for the role. You were quite literally born to play this part. Now, take a second, zoom out, doesn’t that make us all main characters? In every scene of life, we are faced with two opportunities – take the spotlight or blend into the background. There are many people who would always prefer the big lights, but every production needs a background. To truly be there for your loved ones, one of the most powerful things you can do is recognize how and when to be supportive in the midst of living your own life to the fullest. Today may be your day, but it may be theirs as well and to be a great support system, you must acknowledge the coexistence of these two things.
Are we fully aware of the roles that we play in life and everything that comes with them? As the star of your life, you undeniably and unashamedly benefit from the perks of the job. People save your birthday in their calendars, listen to the details of your day and clap for your accomplishments. Being the main character sounds pretty great, huh? This take is undoubtedly controversial as being the main character is not all upsides. There’s the pressure of the spotlight and telling a life story worthy of the screen time. And we can’t forget the notorious antagonists – you know, the ones who don’t clap for your accomplishments. Although it may be hard to accept, they play roles in your life as well – pushing you to face and overcome challenges, which leads you to become the best version of yourself. Luckily for you, the plot tends to favor the main character, so spoiler alert, you’ll be just fine! And if you’re really lucky, you’ll have a team of people rooting for your happy ending.
Introducing the supporting cast! Or as I like to call them, the Main Background Characters. Congratulations are in order again because you’ve landed a few of these roles, too. In fact, you probably have more roles than you can keep track of because, whether you realize it or not, you play many supporting roles. Your calendar is full of birthdays, you’ve listened to countless stories, and you’ve clapped for others’ accomplishments. More often than not, we don’t even realize that we have these roles or appreciate their importance. We get so caught up in the plot of our own stories that we forget that we’re one small part of a very large production. And like any production, you can’t just skip a part and expect the experience to be just as rich and fulfilling.
Maybe you play a major supporting role in someone’s story, or maybe you’re extra #10. The point is, the scene wouldn’t be complete without you. Think of a movie – there’s something to be said for the difference extras make. If we’re following the main character’s journey, why do extras and supporting characters exist at all? Well, consider how empty movies would look without them. The world wouldn’t look like much of a world because, in fact, the world does not revolve around one person; no matter how main the character they play. Gilmore Girls without Sookie St. James? Not cool. Suits without Donna Paulsen? Not even a question. Because stories, life is about so much more than the main character. They’re also about the people who provide us with the love, consideration and feedback to navigate life’s ups and downs. Life would be very lonely, not to mention difficult, without a support system to pick you up when you’re down and to stand beside you when you’re up.
Embracing our roles as background characters means showing up for people the way we hope they would show up for us. Even your support system needs a support system. It is a privilege to be a part of others’ stories and to have the opportunity to make a difference in them. And it’s also an opportunity to make a difference in our own stories. Have you ever heard of an actor stepping into a role in a remake who didn’t watch the Greats who played the role before them? I haven’t. If they have any hope of making their own mark or even improving the portrayal of the story, it’s important to see how things played out before. Taking a step back allows us to observe and learn from others, and prepare for the possibility of landing that role the next time there’s casting. Doesn’t sound like a step back at all.
If we didn’t so often forget the magnitude of the production of life, we’d probably be much better in our supporting roles – as friends, children, siblings, teammates and the list goes on. Don’t miss the big picture. Don’t miss planning your brother’s birthday party or sending a “good luck” text the morning of your friend’s exam. Don’t miss your call time.
In all your roles, don’t forget, most importantly, to be you. After all, that is how you landed them. And let’s not diminish how important it is to play that main character part like it was written for you, because it was! This is your life – live it with purpose, because you have so much purpose. The same way a movie wouldn’t be complete without a supporting cast, it wouldn’t be nearly as enjoyable without a main character. Just… don’t forget to clap when someone else’s show is playing. Recognize and embrace the importance of stepping aside to support and learn from those around you. They need you just as much as you need them. At the end of the day, we’re all Main Background Characters performing for the first time.
~ Some of the most important roles you’ll ever play will be in stories where your part had to be written in.~
